You know the crazy parent on the sidelines at your kid’s sporting events? The one you wish would just shut the hell up already, who yells from beginning to end and makes you want to rip your eardrums out?
Yep. That’s me.
Each week I tell myself that I am going to keep my mouth shut. Each week I tell myself that I am going to be a good girl and stay quiet. Then during warm ups I find myself scouting the other team and when the first whistle blows I turn into a bat out of hell – again. Apparently travel soccer just has that effect on me.
I do praise good efforts and great plays. I just do it loudly. Unless I am yelling at a referee, any criticisms or obnoxious comments are made under my breath so only the other team parents can hear. That’s fair. Isn’t it?
At the beginning of each season we get an email from the soccer association about parents’ behavior at games and I have broken pretty much every one of those guidelines. Just call me Rebel Soccer Mom.
“Remind your child that it’s the effort that counts. Be prepared to cushion his disappointment after a loss by pointing out that your child and his team put forth a tremendous effort.” Blah, Blah, Blah…
“When the game is over, avoid the detailed post-game analysis.” Seriously? I need to talk about the game for at least the next fifteen minutes, if not more. If I had to sit through it, then I get to talk about it. Period.
“Kids take their behavioral cues from you so try to look like you’re enjoying yourself.” Sure. I’ll just pretend that I’m on a beach in Maui sipping rum out of a coconut rather than freezing my ass off watching my kid’s team get clobbered for the sixth straight week. Yay, soccer!
In defense of my lunacy, soccer is the sport I played while growing up, so it’s the one I get most passionate about when watching my kids play. I do not become a raving psycho during baseball season. I swear.
The last few weeks I have done the humane thing and watched the game from my car. It’s warm in there and I can yell as loudly as I want without violating any rules from the Good Soccer Mom code of ethics.
What about you? Do you know any crazed soccer (or hockey, football, baseball, basketball, etc.) moms like me? Are you able to stay calm during your kids’ sporting events?
Photo credit: © Adam Tinney, Dreamstime.com